okay… so having left the rather odd Juba airport behind me, I made my way to Nairobi, where I went directly to the KQ (Kenya Airways) lounge (the Simba lounge) to have some water, a clean toilet and pass the hours until my connection…

when i entered there were these great red chairs that looked a little like they were hugging the person who was sitting in them (which immediately brought Beetlejuice – the movie – to mind… do you remember that scene where the chairs come to life?!)

in any case… I tried sitting on it… and then went to another chair and then another… odd as it may be, I was looking forward to sitting on the plane seat and to eating plane food… of course the fact that I will be in business class helps… but seriously… how often have you said that?!

the kicker was when I arrived in Amsterdam at stupid o’clock in the morning (aka 5ish…) and found that these chairs exist at the KLM lounge here too!!!

sigh…

this new found responsibility is a drag. it is also definitely time consuming and from what i can tell – can increase a person’s risk of heart attack… seriously.

so, the responsibility thing (and the linked time vortex) started before i left New York as i tried to  get myself medically cleared for travel… this was not as easy as one might think because in the States people see pregnancy (one way or another) as an illness, a disability… close the pregnant lady in a room and never let her our! seems to be the most common approach to pregnancy… I am going to extrapolate, and say that this is a very western approach…

not that i am a doctor, but seriously – once upon a time being a measured risk taker was applauded, and being risk averse was akin to being an old lady… that is no longer the case it seems… but all of this is neither here nor there, because I got my clearance and off I went.

I have been extremely careful… all my clothes were sprayed with mozzy repellent (including my PJs), I sprayed my neck, face, hands and ankles before leaving the office every evening, and instead of moisturiser,  I soaked in repellent before going to bed (the stuff has no deet… since I have no intention of poisoning poppy…)

regardless though, this new-found responsibility dictated that I go and have myself tested for malaria before leaving… not that there aren’t good institutions in New York… just that i dont necessarily trust their diagnostics…

but i digress… the day before leaving, I went to the UNDP clinic for a quick malaria test. i got the response an hour later. I have malaria. But, there was something very wrong with the way that the results were presented… no positive/negative, no degree or intensity of my case… just a rather opaque 0-1 malaria parasites found… huh?!

A little freaked out none-the-less, I returned to the office and asked them about a good clinic in the area… there was something less than professional in the UN clinic’s approach… fighting back the tears (because I am an irrational pregnant lady – not because there is anything to cry about… ladies have malaria while pregnant all the time – and still go on to give birth to perfectly healthy lil babies… what the fuck?!) I find a driver and make my way to another clinic…

3 hours and needless emotional turmoil later, it was definitive. I am a rather bizarrely healthy person (only bizarre given my general lifestyle and approach to life the universe and everything…)

so  - apart from feeling horribly guilty for not working throughout the Sunday – it was a fabulous day! I took this weekend seriously, and slept in… which was basically alarm clock went off around 8ish… which interestingly enough only woke me on the Sunday… was picked up around 9, and headed to the office, to catch up on email and finish up the things that one cannot do while in meetings and such…

The world food programme (WFP) deputy head of office (read rather big wig) invited my head of office to her’s for lunch on Sunday… so… around 1345, pen dropped and we headed over to her’s… the fact that we had no clue which of the flats was her’s and we started to randomly knocking and different people’s doors is completely beside the point (although it did significantly contribute to my amusement factor)…

we sat in this open tukul (tukul being the straw houses that are used throughout the continent…) but this one had no walls. the back-drop was phenomenal! Jebel something or another (sorry – didnt catch the name) and bush all around us. it was beautiful and extraordinarily relaxing. the food, pitched as an early thanksgiving was very good, and surprisingly, I even ate an orange vegetable!! well part of it…

the chick is totally field person, and will have to relearn her social skills if/when she returns to the real world… but what can you expect?! she has been out in the field for more than 10 years!!!

it was a lovely day, and well – made me think of how wonderful it would be to have the family out in the field… just need my man to get on board with it…

so… I used to have a friend who broke up with me because of geopolitics. you think I am kidding, but I am very very serious. the details are not that important really, suffice it to say that after spending a weekend with them in Dubai, I told the family in New York that if they stay together two things would happen. He would ask her to chose between him and I, and needless to say, I would lose. And he would become abusive. I will never know if my latter prediction is correct as the former has happened – and I have been cut out of her life… it is what it is, and I hope that I was ultimately wrong and that she is living a happy life.

this happened a while ago (at least a year and a half ago) but  somehow she has been on my mind lately… no clue why maybe because we used to laugh about being “half way there” tomorrow or today (I may be half way there, but have no clue how the counting works…) i will hit the 4 and a half month mark, which I think is half way there… i could be wrong because am pretty sure that they say that one is pregnant for 40 weeks – which I believe is around the 10 month no 9 month mark…

but then they also start counting at your last period – when you were clearly not pregnant, so that knocks about 2 weeks off the count… which brings it back to around 9 and a half months… then you assume that you are going to have 2 to 3 extra days a month… which could knock off two weeks in the grand scheme of things… right!?

in any case, for me this was a milestone, mostly because I can say with absolute certainty that for most of my life I have managed to be half way there… so tomorrow – I will celebrate half way there day

its been a while since i wrote about work… which is not great, but possibly due to the fact that nothing worth writing about happens at work in NY… unless you wanna talk about really grey people who think that they are way more important than they really are…

anyway, for what may be the first time in the history of the UN (he he he – nothing like grandiose statements!! but I might be right here…) two operational teams from two different countries came together in one of the countries to discuss what the fuck! you think i am kidding, but I am not – basically the topic of conversation was – what is the problem and how do we fix it… from two different sides of the same border – it was fascinating!!

the first interesting tid bit was the fact that each operational team adopted (to a degree) the host government position! AWESOME!!! so much for neutrality and all that malarkey! In all fairness I am being a wee bit unfair… each of the team was presenting how “the problem” was perceived and what the challenges were that they were encountering.

So… a few things that were amazing to the southern team… the governing party in the north is so divided that it is basically keeping itself together with bits of gum and yarn, the northern team things that Abyei is contested within the country, and they are rather lucky  because the operating environment in the south is actually quite conducive to getting shit done…

a few things that were amazing to the northern team… the southern team was not undertaking any cross border operations, nor were they aware of any taking place (this was so hard to believe that it continued to be raised throughout the two day meeting…), Abyei area is a contested area period – no geographical affiliation there, and the information that was being produced by the shadow consortium was actually rather accurate…

with a series of decisions for next steps, the teams parted ways with a clear intention to (GULP!) work together…

now that i have gotten the cynical me out of the system… I have to admit that this was an incredible meeting, and I was super lucky to have been part of it… the people who are trying to sort out these rather big and complicated matters are mostly quite good and for the most part – just want to get it done…

that was it last night… I was at work until way too late for this preggers lady (probably around 1030ish), then went to eat with my fabulous head of office, who was definitely there for a rant… which I was simply not into – AT ALL!!!

got to the hotel past midnight to a room that was tiny, had a mosquito net that did not reach the bed and the shower… the shower didnt work… not as a shower for humans in any case…

about a food above my head, the water went in a straight sideways line into the wall, where it proceeded to to fall down… the rest of the shower got a spray like you have when you are in a waterfall… seriously! that was the last straw for me that day…

I sat down in the corner, called my man and ranted away… my poor man tried to help, suggesting all kinds of solutions, but eventually gave up and basically said, go to sleep lady – you are losing your mind…

without much choice in the matter, I did. With a huge pout on my face, I sprayed my whole body with insect repellent (it is a lovely aroma…) and proceeded to try and sleep… which did eventually happen…

regardless of how bad it seemed, by morning I felt better, and the world was no longer coming to an end… I spoke to the admin dude at the office, and hopefully by the time I get back to the hotel they will have sorted out the shower and the mozzy net… this may be too much hope for one day – but hey – tis a new country, everything is possible…

has helped herself to pretty much all my bars… I was left with about 5 from around 24… when I found out I was pissed off

the timing was great, because just as I found out that she had stolen (?! not to over analyse, but does this constitute stealing? or did she just help herself because she got really hungry while cleaning the studio?!) all my bars, she fucking walked in the room…

as you may know, I am a rather expressive person, and the look she got from me – pretty much sent her running. havent seen her since, and well… am moving to the hotel tomorrow… and will not be getting the fabulous (HA?!) room that I had last time…

needless to say, I now lock up my food and electronics… good thing I do not work here, how would I lock up all my food?! hmmm….

yup. I am definitely broken… arrived in South Sudan, crashing with a friend, who happens to be out on R&R. Living it up in the lap of luxury with a fan and an AC, fully operational mosquito net, all is going fabulously…

my friend (who happens to be of the northern countries) has just moved into this place  (the infamous Juba studio) and has yet to really move in… the stove which is new is still packed in white foamy bits and plastic, the telly (the one my hubby really really wants – is huge!) doesnt work and does not appear to be connected to anything in particular, and there do not appear to be any extra sheets or blankets (there are two sporks – half spoon half fork – a bowl, a plate and a coffee mug)…

I went to sleep under the mozzy net only to wake up freezing my arms, my legs, my whole body was simply frozen – I turned off the fan (AC was off already) and used my winter coat to cover myself… it was an odd moment when I realized that the broken thermostat was definitely beyond repair…

sigh…

there are many things that nobody tells you about pregnancy. I find this to be very uncool especially since we (the female we) should be helping each other out with the making of informed decisions and that kinda thing…

for example, forget about sleeping properly through the night, bizarrely thirsty (to the point that this wakes you up at night…) and prepare to pee a ridiculous amount (from day one)… OH! and get ready to be a greyhound fucking dog… seriously! nobody tells you!!!  I think that these explain a lot of the pain and suffering that that one goes through during the first couple of months (3 or 4 – do not believe them that it is less!) but will happily go into that some other time…

what is really interesting is putting preggers together with jetlagged… that one is pretty cool… not necessarily in a good way… so… thirsty is exponentially worse, tired is hilarious… tired is bizarre, but then there is also this odd burst of energy at random moments…

running back and forth to the toilet (a five minute walk – in both directions) is the only exercise that I get in the field – so I really should not be moaning about it… but this is seriously disruptive to work…

you just do. when you are driving down a highway (of sorts) and cars are driving against traffic and nobody seems to be thrown by this – you know you are no longer in NY.. it is a definitive wizard of oz moment when you are fully and completely aware that you are – well, somewhere else.

In all fairness, when this happened in Nairobi, the driver started waving his arms wildly and shook his head sadly when the dude started driving into us… that however is not the case in Juba…

when coming out of a restaurant for dinner, the driver was instructed by the guard to drive into the guard to drive down the wrong way, and when the driver started to turn around, we were shouted at… for stopping traffic… gotta love it!!